Conflicting Emotions >.<

As I've promised, this is the other post I've mentioned in my previous post. hehe

Well...today is the last day before the tennis varsity tryouts tomorrow. I'm really nervous. My heart thumps really hard whenever I thought of my tryouts tomorrow. That is my last chance to escape from the harsh military trainings and tiring PE classes.

I'm afraid that I'm the only beginner who is going to the tryout. I'm afraid to fail. I'm afraid that I would not be qualified. As I've said, I'm only a beginner looking forward to qualify in the tryouts to escape military training.

Though my mom and friends tell me that I should not be nervous. My mom told me that it is alright if I fail, I could tryout again next time. And if I pass, then its the best. I thought about that and believed that what she said was right, but I can't bear to go back to the harsh military training. I'd rather put my extra time on training my tennis skills than in military training.

Shall I go or not?My brain tells me to just chicken out and do what I got to do, but my heart tells me to do what I truly want to do and not worry about failing. What am I to do? I wish there'd be someone who could give me his/her very honest opinion, whether I should go or not. I think the possibility of me going is higher because after all my anticipations and excitement, my pride will not allow me to just give-up without even trying.

At least tomorrow, I'm not alone. Another friend of mine is joining the tryout with me. He was one of my close friends back in high school, who was also a student of my tennis instructor. A fellow beginner...hehe If he was brave enough to join the tryouts, why should I back-out? I think I've made up my mind. No matter what happens, I will go. I just pray that it will not rain tomorrow and that I don't get lost on my way to the tryout venue haha :P

P.S. Just another page torn out from my human diary to post it here hehe :D Hope you didn't get sleepy while reading this post because I know its boring haha :P